Grandparent visitation: two steps
Step one — standing. Before the court considers whether visitation is a good idea, the grandparent must show they are entitled to be heard at all. Under DRL §72, standing generally arises where one or both parents have died, or where circumstances exist making it equitable for the court to intervene.
That second route usually turns on whether a substantial relationship already exists between grandparent and grandchild — or, where a parent has actively prevented one from forming, on whether the grandparent made sufficient effort to establish it.
Step two — best interests. Only after standing is established does the court consider whether visitation serves the child’s best interests, weighing the existing relationship, the reasons for the parents’ objection, the effect on the child, and the level of animosity between the adults.
Standing under DRL §72 arises from a parent’s death or equitable circumstances. Courts examine the existing relationship, reasonable efforts to form one where contact was frustrated, and the nature of the parents’ objection. A fit parent’s decision receives substantial weight; standing does not itself establish a right to visitation.
What generally does not work: a grandparent who has had little contact and seeks a relationship they never had. The statute protects existing relationships more readily than it creates new ones.
Non-parent custody: extraordinary circumstances
Custody is a higher bar again. A non-parent — grandparent, relative, or someone who has raised the child — cannot obtain custody against a parent simply by showing they would do a better job.
They must first show extraordinary circumstances. New York courts have recognized categories including surrender, abandonment, persistent neglect, unfitness, and a prolonged disruption of custody where a child has lived with the non-parent for an extended period.
Only if extraordinary circumstances are established does the court reach the best interests analysis. Without them, the case ends there regardless of the comparison between households.
Bennett v Jeffreys and Suarez v Williams require extraordinary circumstances before a contested non-parent custody claim proceeds to best interests. Recognized circumstances include surrender, abandonment, persistent neglect, unfitness and extended disruption of custody. DRL §72 includes qualifying voluntary separation for 24 continuous months in a grandparent’s household, while permitting a finding on a shorter period.
Where the animosity between adults matters
Courts pay attention to whether a grandparent’s involvement will subject a child to sustained conflict between the adults who are supposed to care for them. A petition pursued in a way that escalates the conflict can undermine itself, which is a practical argument for attempting resolution before litigation.
Frequently asked questions
Can grandparents get visitation in New York?
Yes, under DRL §72, but they must first establish standing — generally where a parent has died or where equitable circumstances exist, typically involving a substantial existing relationship. The court then considers the child’s best interests.
Do grandparents have automatic visitation rights?
No. Standing must be established before the court will consider the request at all.
Can a grandparent get custody?
Only by first showing extraordinary circumstances — such as abandonment, persistent neglect, unfitness, or a prolonged disruption of custody. Being a better caregiver is not sufficient on its own.
What if the parents refuse contact?
Parental objection is significant but not automatically decisive. Where a parent has actively prevented a relationship from forming, courts consider the efforts the grandparent made.
Is guardianship an alternative?
Sometimes. Where a child is already living with a relative, guardianship may fit the situation better than a custody petition.
Related: Guardianship of a Minor · Child Custody & Parenting Time · back to Family Law
Written by Dale Riedel, Esq. · Admitted in New York, Bar No. 5837539 · Last reviewed October 6, 2026